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Punk publishing for spiky emotions

Recently I got this zine from People’s Book in Takoma Park, MD.

This first reason struck me HARD: “To experience the freedom of making something without waiting for permission.”

Since experiencing the complicated miracle of getting traditionally published, I’ve struggled with how to define myself as an author. (And I thought the hard part would be finally calling myself an author.) The idea of creating something to pitch to an editor or offer up to to social media critique felt more daunting 2 years after publication than it did when I got my offer. The idea of just making something for the joy of creation felt indulgent since I’d learned that my time and my creativity are both finite resources at this current moment. (Because I still live in the world.) I needed a way to create that was easy, scratched a creative itch and gave me the option of sharing without commercial considerations. Zines spoke to me.

Now when I have a feeling or a memory that gives me a strong urge to write, I make a zine.

This one is about a poem I’ve been thinking about since sophomore year of high school.

This one is about my dad, and how weird grief is.

I don’t know what I’m going to do with zines when they’re done. But the process of making them is so cathartic. Making theses fast zines does everything for me that my attempts at journaling never could. And it gave me something to post here, for the first time in months. Win-win.